Dissecting The Dirty Word: Feminism

Many people when they hear the word “feminist”, the image of RadFem activists come to mind. For example: 

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The majority of people tend to ignore the intersectionality and complexity of feminism, and undermine it completely. It is deemed stereotypically by most as a collective of “man-hating lesbians”. In reality, this is not the case. I do not claim to be an expert on feminism, but I hope to enlighten people through this article on why the stereotypes and misconceptions hurt everyone; not just women.

The radicality of Feminism is not what you think it is:

Radical feminism, in theory, is great. It does not imply militancy, or violence (which it is stereotypically seen). This use of the word “radical” pertains to finding the “root” of the problem. Radical feminists try to dismantle the oppressive patriarchal forces in society (most notably sexism) to try and create a equal society. However, radical feminists tend to be trans* exclusionary (TERFs) and sex worker exclusionary (SWERFs). This is a horrible and hurtful take on a movement; one which is meant to establish and defend the rights of ALL women, despite race, sexuality or whether they are cisgendered or transgendered.

Groups such as FEMEN, whom society thinks of when they hear “radical feminism”, are a different story. As well as their questionable policy of “sextremism”, FEMEN is run by a tyrannical misogynist: check here, here and here. There is nothing wrong with men being part of the feminist movement in my eyes, but Svyatski is the furthest thing from it. Another problem with this group is their attacks of religious orders, especially Islam, which many Muslim women have spoken out about.

Movements within feminism that hurt the cause seem to be the only movements which gain any recognition. The extreme always makes an impression but in this case, I am thoroughly and wholeheartedly against it. This should not be the face of feminism. We learned with first and second wave feminism that white, middle-class women were not meant to be at the heart and sole cause of feminism, so why should groups still adhere to these ideas?

Man-hating, hairy lesbians make up the majority of Feminism:

WRONG. Everyone is different. So who cares if you have hairy armpits or if you’re a girl who likes to kiss girls? Bodily integrity and freedom of sexuality are human rights and no one has the right to shame someone for what they do with their body. No one should ever use a term of someone’s sexuality as a shaming term. It’s something I have been guilty of in the past and which I have decided to eradicate from my vocabulary. Maybe you won’t listen to me, but maybe you’ll listen to Hilary Duff . As well as body shaming and using homophobic slurs to attack the movement, society has also adopted the extremely critical and hurtful portmanteau, “feminazi”.

This harassment of feminists is outright misogyny, and it comes from both sexes. How are we supposed to obtain equality if there is still rampant discrimination of people? This is also the problem with feminism which is exclusionary, which I mentioned previously. People are highly critical of anything which they find to be “other”. This takes us back to patriarchal values of gender and race; and so cisgendered, heterosexual, white males are the dominant, whereas everything else is other. Here are two examples of this:

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We have been socialized to think that this is the norm and have become almost blinded to this dominance. This misrepresentation has been damaging the the world as a whole, as minorities (PoC, trans* people and women) are undermined and overlooked in the face of this oppressive system. So the point I am trying to make is that feminism is not about misandry and hating men, it’s about the intrinsically Western male values upheld by society today that need to be eradicated for society to move forward and evolve for the better.

The Problem with White Feminists:

Many people believe that Western feminism is unnecessary because “women and men are equal in the Western World”. As a cisgendered, heterosexual white female, I understand and acknowledge my privilege in the world. I have had a better life than the majority of the women, be they WoC or trans*. Even though I have been a victim of sexism in the Western World, I would never place my female experience as higher or more important than others. Sexism coupled with racism, homophobia and/or transphobia is far worse than what I (and what many other women of a similar background to mine) have faced or continue to face.

The problem with white feminism is that a lot of them tend to ignore the troubles that WoC face. I thoroughly support what is mentioned in this blog here. Feminism began as a movement to create a sisterhood which would stand together against patriarchal forces. It began exclusionary and it is still exclusionary. We cannot even begin to understand the hardship faced by WoC, but it is necessary that we acknowledge our privilege, stand by them and support them.

White feminists are especially problematic if they are people in power. A good example of this is Miley Cyrus. She claims to be a feminist, but in actually fact she is commodifying black female sexuality and culture, as well as performing Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines”, also known as “No Means Yes”.

Feminism is just as much a race issue as it is a gender one; as well as economics, politics and social issues are important in this movement. It’s important for us to work together on a worldwide scale to revert the problems we face today. Two good projects which have aimed to do so are Everyday Sexism, which joins women globally against sexual harassment and abuse, and One Billion Rising.

Rape culture, LAD culture and MRAs:

All of the above go hand in hand, and are extremely detrimental to ever achieving equality. Rape culture involves victim blaming and sexual objectification and LAD culture also encapsulates sexual objectification as well as slut-shaming. Girls are brought up and taught that they can only have sex for the purpose of pro-creation. Having sex with someone who isn’t your boyfriend/girlfriend/partner makes you a slut. Having too much sex makes you a slut, enjoying sex makes you a slut. But on the other hand, in the face of LAD culture, not having enough sex or refusing sex makes you a prude or a tease. Either way, the victim of sexual objectification is blamed.

MRAs indulge in much of the same behaviour, and seem to have this idea of “compulsory heterosexuality” , which Adrienne Rich has talked about previously.  The majority of MRAs are white, cishet males, you can see a definitive link between all the problems I have addressed previously. It all comes down to patriarchal values.

MRAs may not be at a booming level, but LAD culture is at an all time high, with “Bird of the Day” pages cropping up in almost every university and IT in Ireland this year as well as pages such as The Lad Bible, Ultimate LAD and more gaining followers in the millions for their misogynistic and discriminative posts (albeit, the comments by the members are almost worse).

All of these cultures have this idea of “restoring” masculinity to society, and condemn homosexuals (especially the MRAs), no matter how subtle it may be. Males which like to adhere to this culture often feel the need to inflate their male identities by indulging in sexual objectification, slut-shaming and by calling out any stereotypical feminine behaviour by a male as “gay”.

To conclude, I think that the most important thing to do to implement feminism and equality is to eradicate the defaults our society lives by: white, cisgendered, heterosexual. But to do so, we must try to dismantle western patriarchal values and LAD culture from the norm. It is our mothers, our daughters, sisters, cousins and friends who are being damaged in the long run and we cannot keep passing down this recurrent oppression that has been in place for years.

To see more, here are a few of my favourite talks:

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie – We Should All Be Feminists

Jackson Katz – Violence Against Women is a Men’s Issue

Caroline Heldman – The Sexy Lie

Joss Whedon at Make Equality Reality

Does My Vagina Offend You, Yeah?: An Exploration Of The Debasement Of Women & Misogyny in Irish Society

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Vagina. Va-gi-na. Noun. The muscular tube leading from the external genitals to the cervix of the uterus in women and most female mammals. Exactly what it says on the tin. So why are a lot of men and women in this country so afraid of vaginas? And I’m not talking about homophobia (even though there is far too much of that still circulating in Irish society). There is a severe taboo around the female reproductive system. Not just here, but around the world.

Whether it’s breasts, the clitoris or our rear ends, the fascination with degrading women is highly prevalent in Ireland. In this piece, I will explore aspects of the female body which have been targeted by males and females in a negative light in Irish society; as well as the lack of rights which females have.

Menstruation & Body Hair: 

Now I know for a fact that a period is not the best feeling in the world. Some of my famous quotes while I have been enduring the horrific cramps have been “Will someone please surgically remove my womb before I do it myself?” or “It feels like there is monsters in my uterus”. But why do we feel the need to ignore it’s actual name? It’s not a curse word.

So now I will direct you to Tampax’s “Outsmart Mother Nature” campaign which is cringe-worthy. Exhibit A:

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Why do the marketing people feel the need to talk down to women in this highly colloquial advert? We’re not children. To assume that women cannot engage in sexual relations when on their period makes us all out to be some sort of monsters:  does “Don’t trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn’t die” ring any bells? A lot of males and females I know are entirely disgusted by what a period entails, but as Georgina, creator of Vox Copuli states: “I refuse to not discuss [my period] because it makes men uncomfortable”.

And why should we feel uncomfortable about what happens to us every 28 days on average? As mammals, female humans have one of the most frequent menstruation periods, which means more fertility. You should be embracing this, not keeping it hush-hush because someone somewhere said it was gross. It occurs far too often for us to pretend it doesn’t exist, or to conceal it’s true identity with a little old lady claiming to be “Mother Nature”. As well as being a natural bodily function, it’s a healthy reminder that you’re not pregnant and you can continue doing rad things without worrying about a baby.

When I asked online “Do you think female body hair is gross?”, the majority of people said yes. I never really thought twice about pubic hair until I thought about how it’s only acceptable to be clean shaven as a woman in Ireland. So I decided to part with all razors for six weeks and see if I really felt gross. And I didn’t. Having body hair is so natural and it’s only been normalized to have a shaven pubic area in Western culture since the late 70s. Why should women feel under pressure to shave? If a guy is really that fussy, he doesn’t deserve your pussy.

Between periods and pubic hair, the female body is seen as ugly in it’s natural state and constantly needs to be modified to suit a males standards.

The Taboo of Feminism:

I am constantly given grief by males and females about being a feminist. Irish people act like it is such a dirty word. Women usually do not voice their opinions on women’s rights in public for fear that being a feminist will make them unattractive to males. Many women turn a blind eye to sexism and many males act like sexism doesn’t exist. The majority of people I have come into contact with believe that feminists are a bunch of angry, man-hating girls. But feminism is about creating equality; not saying that women are superior to men. There is a big difference between feminism and misandry, which you can see here. The definition of feminism to me is:

 “A collection of movements and ideologies aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights for women. This includes seeking to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment. A feminist advocates or supports the rights and equality of women.”

I don’t hate men. My mantra as a heterosexual woman is “Love dick, not dicks”.

Objectification of Women in Public Places & Online:

The cat-calling. The wolf-whistles. All women of all ethnicities, shapes and sizes has felt the wrath of verbal sexual harassment in all places. But never has a man been degraded in such a way. Every night out involves another comment on my “massive tits” or my “huge arse” and every single time I get the same response when I complain about it: “They are just being lads!”. This recent idea of a male being a “lad” has somehow allowed it to be socially acceptable for more men to be misogynists.

A prime example of this is The Lad Bible, debasing women every second of the day. It is a website predominantly aimed at males, with the topics of discussion based around “lad” interests: their own masculinity, soccer and half-naked women. I once saw a section called “Something To Cure The Hangover”. It was a post of pictures submitted by males of their unclothed exes. There was obviously no consent from the women, and the page boasts a whopping 1.6 million likes on Facebook. Everyone worldwide is going to make sexual comments or slut-shame these girls. Who deserves to get called a whore by someone they don’t know? Who deserves to hear disgusting comments made about their body?

As well as this, The Lad Bible’s devoted followers refer to women as “wenches”:

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What a nice boy. About one-third of my Facebook friends have liked this page; many of them thinking it’s a bit of “banter”.

Just today, my local radio station was on the quest for “the best boobs”. The majority of the listeners are young adults who are easily influenced. I watched as comment after comment young girls and boys made suggestions, while I and one other woman commented on the obvious objectification of women. Our comments were ignored and the discussion continued. I was not surprised.

Physical Sexual Harassment:

For some reason, Irish males think it is totally socially acceptable to feel a girl up. Many, if not all of my female friends have experienced some sort of physical sexual harassment, in private or in public. I, for one, have been groped countless times in nightclubs and bars; which many girls brush off. But I’ve also been in a situation where a male has forced his hands down my tights, when I’ve repeatedly told him to stop.  Just last week I had a boy put his arms around my waist and forced his open mouth on my closed one. When he retracted, he wondered why I wasn’t enjoying it. Because a lot of males assume that females will enjoy any physical interaction: after all, The Lad Bible believes we are nothing but wenches.

The Evil Feminist makes a very strong and important point in this post:

“Women have to do so little to be declared “man haters”. All we have to do is name male violence for what it is…But for a man to be declared a “woman hater” he has to do so much more. Even when men abuse, rape, prostitute and kill women, they’re excused… His victim’s actions are looked for as if his hatred was a logical reaction to her own actions.”

This is easily backed up by the statistics of rape in Ireland. In 2011, over 2000 women came to the National Rape Crisis Centre for help. Over 90% of them knew the perpetrator. But think of all the women who are silenced and live in fear? Rapists are very rarely convicted in Ireland, and the laws regarding rape and sexual assault are so degrading to women.

Abortion Laws:

It is illegal for a woman to get an abortion in Ireland unless she threatens to commit suicide or her life is in danger. A woman cannot have an abortion if she is raped, is pregnant by incest or if her child has fatal foetal abnormalities. Basically, a woman has no choice here unless she is on her deathbed. And while The Protection Of Life During Pregnancy Law is extremely degrading to women, it is a step forward to having control over our own bodies.

But we will still be called blood-thirsty murderers and whores by the likes of the Youth Defence and misogynistic TD Jim Walsh. The anti-choice side of the debate is filled with women-hating religious extremists who ignore the women’s right to her own body. The lack of proper sexual education in Ireland is abysmal. Holland boasts the lowest abortion rates in the world with abortion available on demand. Sexual education is not something you need to learn on an exam, it’s a necessary part of human knowledge. And by sexual education, I do not mean the Youth Defence’s suggestion that women need to learn about how to avoid getting raped.

These are only a few things that have been normalized over the years which allow blatant misogyny in Irish culture. Sexism is rife in the Republic and there is an obvious need to combat the sexism in our society. Our country seems to be still in the hands of Dev’s Ireland, where the women’s place is in the home. A female TD being groped by a fellow colleague whilst in the Dáil barely caused a ripple in the media. I’d like to mention that this happened whilst he was under the influence of alcohol during a debate over women’s reproductive rights.

The silence of Irish women must be broken; the sexism must be stopped.